Something I now see more clearly than ever is the natural occurrence in my early years of suffering intensely and of wanting to know objectively how the entire energetics of the illusion work to create time and space. I wasn’t looking for something called awareness but for the end of suffering. The reason I use the word energetics is that we cannot understand this suffering merely through specific objects interacting with each other since it is obvious that all objects or concepts occur together and the me who suffers is never separate from the world he inhabits and is fearful of. But there is a force of momentum in the energy of contraction which makes us sense and above all feel through heavy emotion that we are indeed separate.… The fear and the need to not be present with it are the driving force behind the huge thought based time lines within which suffering occurs and it feels like it is the only reality….. after decades of experimenting with stopping a me story from building or just removing heavy divisive emotions or from just accepting the story as just life as a human, to trying to stay as awareness or acceptance itself etc, I now am wondering if living just from being is possible in our everyday living as humans. What I mean by being is living without thinking in terms of a me story but from trust and faith and perhaps instinct ? I know animals and trees are given what is needed easily and do not resist dying if that is what happens … can we live as gracefully as that ? They don’t doubt and wait and pray …As humans I feel our brains are equipped to experience infinite potential without knowing it as regular separation based memory. It is instinct as us. The only issue is if we get stuck through attachment to any aspect of this infinite happening which can only occur when we experience separation again…. So the question is can we live fully right now in this effortless splendour called life instead of living through anticipation, fear, greed etc ….. can we be open to full enjoyment and bliss while living in the world without getting attached to any of it ? Obviously there cannot be a description of how etc since it is more vibrational and energetic and it is from the ability of the human brain to fully come to emptiness or void without any fear of loss of itself that it also comes to fullness and infinite potential without losing presence and without thinking there’s any big deal to it either …. There’s a deeper knowing and calm at work than our more regular human faculties and separation based memory. It’s like Nis’s words - where nothing is remembered but everything is known.